Bill Burr's thoughts on the NFL Draft

Because you've got to be able to laugh at yourself in this life. I can safely admit that I used to attend the draft in NYC every year, as a teenager.

Now, between the random "experts" on the 2838585 blogs out there and the windbags on both major networks that cover the draft, I find the draft insufferable. Luckily, I was able to pick up a shift at my 2nd job, a spot with no tv's in sight, so I can enjoy the draft in peace.

Rather than ramble on like Robert Plant, I'll let Bill Burr sum it up better than I ever could. And remember, I openly admit that I was and guess always will be (in Bill's eyes, at least) one of those freakin' losers haha enjoy the laugh, folks. Oh, and apologies on the language... Bill loves himself some F bombs!

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Hahaha. Thats funny stuff and spot on. I used to be one of those too but now its just too much and overblown.

I'm wired -- I can't help myself.

To each his own I guess; I believe that a lot of us have invested a lot of time doing evaluations, trying to guess which Draftees fit into our system, and the variables are astronomical.
After sorting through all the Draft prospects I think it's human nature to want to see how close to the professional scouts, GM's, & Coaches choices we can get with our predictions.( like fitting the pieces to a complex puzzle)
I think what's comical though, is that when a player is taken, that's not even on most peoples radar, it makes most of us take a step back and try'n reconfigure where we went wrong in our pre-Draft evaluations.
Bottom line, I believe it's the "Gambler" in all of us that makes us want to watch how the Draft shakes out, and that we want to believe that we could probably do a good job of beating the odds.

Using the same logic he could argue that we should never watch sports because we could just read the box score in the paper the next day.

If he was railing against high school recruiting rankings I'd be more sympathetic, but college football generates about the same revenue as the NHL. So to say we don't know anything about the players is a bit of a stretch. And this isn't even getting into the fact that the draft is considered the single most important event for team building in the world's most lucrative sport.

That said, I'm actually a really big fan of Bill Burr. He can make unfunny material funny with his delivery, and he's one of the few comedians left that will say whatever is on his mind without fear.

You're so right about the windbags on ESPN and nfl network


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NHL. So to say we don't know anything about the players is a bit of a stretch. And this isn't even getting into the fact that the draft is considered the single most important event for team building in the world's most lucrative sport.

That said, I'm actually a really big fan of Bill Burr. He can make unfunny material funny with his delivery, and he's one of the few comedians left that will say whatever is on his mind without fear.[/quote]


Im not sure how you can compare watching an NFL game and sitting on a couch for three days watching a guy read names off a card. Im also not sure what the NFL's, college football or NHL's revenue has to do with anything. You're spending three days watching a guy read names off a card.

Bill Burr is one of my favorite comics too, and I'll bet the genesis of this bit comes from watching the draft himself. No need to overthink a comedy bit - it's not like Hedberg actually hated arrows or gravity.

Subzero717":13633185 said:

I'm not sure how you can compare watching an NFL game and sitting on a couch for three days watching a guy read names off a card. Im also not sure what the NFL's, college football or NHL's revenue has to do with anything. You're spending three days watching a guy read names off a card.

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College football is America's 5th biggest sport in terms of revenue, right behind NHL. In terms of ratings, it is likely higher than that.

They aren't just names off a card, many of them are players that even casual fans will remember from watching college football games. Many of them won't be recognized, but you can still associate them as being part of a team you've seen play many times.

Some of them, for better or worse, are household names before they are drafted. There is an element of drama and intrigue in finding out where these players end up going in the NFL.

Ultimately, it doesn't matter if we watch or not, but considering the immense importance of the event of course fans are going to be interested in the minutiae. It also makes for great reality television given all the twists and all the mindgames GMs play on each other. Maybe it's not for everyone but it's silly for anyone to pretend it's not entertaining or meaningful, which is why the comedy bit falls flat for me (other than this particular bit, I think his work is terrific).

Like AgentDib, I would guess that Burr loves watching the draft himself, it's probably just material he used because it was low hanging fruit for snark.

AgentDib":1cfh2wdl said:

Bill Burr is one of my favorite comics too, and I'll bet the genesis of this bit comes from watching the draft himself. No need to overthink a comedy bit - it's not like Hedberg actually hated arrows or gravity.

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This. It's just material for making people laugh.

3 things:

1) I love reading posts by NYCoug. I'm an infinitely bigger fan of David than Bill Burr. Post more often, David.

2) Now it's time to draft. Teams need to not suffer paralysis by analysis. Draft deserving FOOTBALL players, not projects that could eventually work out. I'm not against the tools like SPARQ that help dig into a player. But, gotta be careful to not start thinking something like how many Jumping Jacks a kid can do will determine the length and success of an NFL career. I heard something today on one of the talking heads shows that I actually agreed with. It's not where you're drafted, but getting drafted by the right team for how you would fit in. It was Drew Brees saying that in an interview. This is not to be confused with just how the Seahawks might identify prospects they are more willing to draft. Those players don't always end up fitting well with a team. They might just fit a draft profile.

3) The deal with the draft is that there are other factors that are a draw. The victory of the human spirit, watching kids achieve something very few actually do. Not being just about ourselves, but delighting in the success of others. Etc. There's ALL sorts of fascinating aspects of the draft. To boil it down to listening to names read off a card... then one just doesn't get it. That would be someone who says "I'm a bricklayer" rather than saying, "I build Cathedrals". We can choose joy in life or wallow in the bland by our own choosing.

Note: I realize Burr's bit about this is to have fun with it for the sake of comedy. Whether or not he believe's it or not is irrelevant. It works for the routine like said elsewhere in this thread... to the casual observer.

Bill Burr is great and that is a pretty hilarious bit.

That said; I mean if we are being totally honest, you could make that argument for almost all of the "entertaining" things we do. It's entertainment, most of it is pretty "mindless" to those who aren't interested in it. I think knitting is stupid. I'm sure knitters think the NFL draft is stupid. If you are "into it," there's many layers that make it far more than churning yarn or watching names being read off of cards.

The Draft for me, is like playing the lottery. It's a game within a game. We all love football more than box scores. We all have player and position preferences...it's fun to see if "your methodology/thinking" is right.

Burr is great. Him poking fun at one of my favorite things is pretty funny and spot on to the casual observer.

TeamoftheCentury":2qys0dpo said:

The deal with the draft is that there are other factors that are a draw. The victory of the human spirit, watching kids achieve something very few actually do. Not being just about ourselves, but delighting in the success of others. .

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I agree with this line of thinking 100%. If it were that simple. Where I don't like the draft part is when a windbag that's never played a down or worked in a front office shreds the kid on national television as a "reach" and points out that he is too short, not athletic enough, didn't score high enough on his wonderlic, Brings up personal things about his past. Whether it be a blog or Mel Kiper doing it to 3 of our very first picks of our franchises best draft. Heck even Bill Polian was ridiculing Bobby Wagner when we selected him.

The other as pointed out by NYCoug is the endless nauseating coverage from the outlets and blogs. How many Bleacher Report mocks are there? What is the meaning of any of them? Between the end of college football to draft day without a snap played they will have dozens and dozens. I'm sure everyone here has read the Sherman interview on this very topic and he articulates better than I ever could.

Subzero717":iwd4rs4o said:

TeamoftheCentury":iwd4rs4o said:

The deal with the draft is that there are other factors that are a draw. The victory of the human spirit, watching kids achieve something very few actually do. Not being just about ourselves, but delighting in the success of others. .

Click to expand...

I agree with this line of thinking 100%. If it were that simple. Where I don't like the draft part is when a windbag that's never played a down or worked in a front office shreds the kid on national television as a "reach" and points out that he is too short, not athletic enough, didn't score high enough on his wonderlic, Brings up personal things about his past. Whether it be a blog or Mel Kiper doing it to 3 of our very first picks of our franchises best draft. Heck even Bill Polian was ridiculing Bobby Wagner when we selected him.

The other as pointed out by NYCoug is the endless nauseating coverage from the outlets and blogs. How many Bleacher Report mocks are there? What is the meaning of any of them? Between the end of college football to draft day without a snap played they will have dozens and dozens. I'm sure everyone here has read the Sherman interview on this very topic and he articulates better than I ever could.

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I would respond with advice, your choice to take it or not. Here it is: Don't let them spoil your enjoyment, if you like the draft. If they bother you, don't let it. Not sure what else to say. Everyone knows the reason there are so many mock drafts and all. Everyone is trying to be noticed, etc. Whatever. That's the media age we live in.

Some of that drives the popularity of the draft. Because everyone has their "opinion" (ie: Evan Boehm sucks, Boehm is the toughest Center in the draft, Boehm is a 2nd round talent - "Nah, nah, nah... he's a late round/ UDFA.") Some people enjoy it because they care more about being "right." I actually enjoy it because I actually understand the apparent needs of several clubs (esp the Hawks) and like to see how they go about addressing it. To me, it engages the mind (which is sort of hilarious to see how those who don't "get it" ridicule the entertainment value.)

The back and forth with the mediots is part entertainment (if you keep that in check), but there are some really trying to be honest in their assessment. This is the age where "everyone gets a trophy." Well, the truth is there's stiff competition. So, there's a lot of evaluation and proving to be done. Talk is cheap. Show it on the field. So, I don't mind a little caution. I don't know that I've heard too many just rail on a prospect that is draft-worthy without also pointing out their strengths. But, even if they are... prospects probably love it or use it as motivation. Good. They should. Hope it fuels them even more. They probably laugh at the commentators. They're getting drafted. That says something. So, as much as they scoff at anything, the player can take satisfaction knowing that and NFL team felt differently.

The draft is fun to watch with others who "get it." It's esp fun to watch with fans of several other teams. It's like hanging in a barber shop. It's an event where I don't mind engaging socially because there's a lot of in-between time to do that.