I can't watch football anymore. I love the Seahawks. But....

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  • Also, I too went through a softball addiction. I just couldn't get enough. I sold my kid's Playstation so I could I could shave the barrel of my bat down, to get that extra little bit I needed to hit some home runs. I would act like I was going to work, only to go to the ballfield all day, practicing defense by myself. I would field imaginary balls, running over different scenarios in my head. I would throw imaginary runners out and scream at the foolish imaginary umpires. I would come home with my legs scratched up (I play softball in jean shorts) with nothing to show for myself. Sure, we won the regional championship, but we never made it out of the state. Eventually, I blew through our savings and had to sell my bat. It was total bullshit, but family is all about sacrifice. It gets better.
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  • HawkWow wrote:
    bellingerga wrote:get some anger management counseling, and I dont mean this as a shot. It will help you find ways to deal with getting that pissed off, and of course remember it's just a game.

    Would hate to lose a fellow seahawk fan, but if you do not comeback, good luck in life and take care.

    Just take a nice long break from it though, thats for sure.


    This^....and Bellingerga is giving you the best gift you could hope for...if you consider his advice. I live in an area and work in a field that is prone to fights (very much so). I was on my 4th assault charge and facing jail when my attorney advised me to enroll in an alternative to violence class. I actually enjoy fighting so signed up only so the judge might give me a break. Little did I know that once I accepted the fact I wasn't living right, the class likely saved my life.

    I was in a situation with a former adversary recently where he called me out. I'd beat this guy in the ring and on the street before and knew I would emerge victorious....but then a little light went off in my head and I walked away. I was concerned how I would feel the next morning. I woke up, considered the nite before...and felt awesome. Later I learned the guy had a razor and planned on using it.

    Buddah teaches that once you engage, you've already lost the fight. Go see someone dude. Not just for your kids but for yourself as well. You'll become whole, you'll love yourself again and I wish you luck.

    Agree with both these guys 100%. I just about lost my job a couple of months ago for several blow-ups at fellow employees. In fact, I was terminated and only got back thanks to a win in the grievance process. I'm not far from full pension and while my industry is so skill specific I likely would've found another job fairly quickly and made it to pension anyway, I would've also blown 4 weeks vacation (5 in another three years) and great days off (Friday, Saturday and Sunday). More importantly I was embarassed by my behavior and am greatful for the chance to be seen differently over the next few years I have left to work where I work. Part of the stipulation of me returning has been anger management counseling and I have found it VERY helpful already both in terms of the counselor's suggestions as well as making me stop and think before reacting when shit goes wrong on the job and other people are idiots and so on and so forth. As you can see, I may have always been able to seperate disappointment regarding the Seahawks from my 'real' life but have not been so good at keeping my cool in other areas of my life.

    You may qualify for state assistance for counseling too Jon considering what you said about your finances. Think about it man.

    EDIT: After reading your last post, you're in my prayers for that teaching job. Hope others join me.....
    Last edited by hawksfansinceday1 on Sun Jan 13, 2013 3:48 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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  • SharkHawk wrote:I think seriously I have to be done. I did something I am so horribly ashamed of after the game and I don't know that I can in good conscience watch another game EVER. I feel awful. Just awful.

    I snapped at my kids and then threw the remote and it shattered against the wall and scared my kids. They both started crying. It's time for me to walk away. Everybody is really upset here. I think this is corny, but I also think it has to be my farewell. Sorry for putting it in the main forum, but it is most definitely Seahawks related, and I am sure many other fans are having a hard time coming to terms.

    Let what I did be a lesson. I'm lucky no pieces hit my children. But I can't put them through that anymore. I love them with all my heart. More than the Seahawks. I've given the Seahawks 36 years of my life to get it done. They've come close. But I can't leave my family without a father due to a heart attack, and I can't ever EVER harm my children by my words or actions. They deserve a better father, and unfortunately the Seahawks don't bring that out of me. Please don't label me a quitter or a whiner or a baby. Understand that my life has been destroyed in the last two years financially, career-wise, emotionally, and physically. This is the proverbial straw I guess. I just can't do this anymore.

    Please.... don't let this game get you like it did me. It was too much, so I step away and hope for a better future for the Hawks for all of YOUR sake. You guys deserve it. You put your butts in the seats and scream until your hoarse for this team. You 12's make me proud. I really have made some incredible friendships here, and hope to continue those, but after what I did today, I can NOT be involved in sports-fandom ever again. Now it's time to pick up the pieces so to speak and try to fix what I've done to my kids in scaring them senseless. No kid should ever have to be afraid of a game result because of how their Dad might handle it. My kids are awesome and they deserve better than the piece of crap I was today. Guilt overwhelms me. I am afraid for myself right now. I am sad for my kids. But I respect all of you and how you keep it together and find a balance where I never could.

    Rock on 12's.

    Jon Mohlman (the man behind the shark mask)


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  • Lol.
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  • I'm going to make a serious post here. I'm also gonna admit something here that might get me in trouble with .net.

    I'm 17, so I'm a minor. I've posted in the shack and PWR forums before, so I don't know how severe a violation that is, and I'm sorry mods.

    This is me. I'm wearing a dress shirt and tie, because I am quite passionate about politics and felt like dressing up. I have a reputation as a very smart kid and the go-to person with any governmental or political questions. I've single-handedly turned most of my school into a breeding ground for new, young Libertarians. (I know a lot of you disagree with my views, but just ignore my political stances, they're not the point of this.)
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    I'm also a swimmer, a lacrosse player, and soon to be football player as a senior in high school next year. I'm trying to get my grades up as I've recently gotten my life together. I want to try to get into University of Delaware, but that looks pretty unlikely. So I'm looking at some smaller, D-III type schools. I want to major in Secondary Education and become a teacher at my current high school after college. I have it all planned out.

    I say so much about my life, because today I've experienced such intense ups-and-downs from a game that I wasn't even playing. I ended up breaking my smartphone, the only nice thing I really have, out of sheer anger. My family is in financial ruins, and I'm not going to be able to afford another phone for a good while. I've been chilling and putting things into perspective, and it really is just a game. Although it is my passion, it may be quite unhealthy for me. There's so much more to life..

    I did say I was going to try out for football this year. I've been studying intensely and working out. RW has inspired me to try to be a starting QB for my team. It is my dream. My ex-girlfriend introduced me to the coach last year, when I was going through tough times. He's been sort of a life coach for me since. I used to get angry and smash things, and he'd always chill me out in his room and just sit and talk to me for a good hour about life. It helped me out, a bunch.

    I know it's not anything formal, but he helped me straighten out a bit, until my asshole relapse today. Maybe that can be likened to some anger management classes of sorts, SharkHawk. I don't want you to go, I look forward to your posts about as much as I do Kearly's. You're a treasure of .net, and a knowledgeable, respectable man. If you feel this is what's best, then from one person to another, I wish you the best in all future endeavors.

    I probably need some help myself. I'm going to channel my rage into working out harder from now on. I hope it goes well. Sometimes we all need to remember, it is just a game. A game that we're all passionate about and love, but a game nonetheless that we're not even playing. Count backwards from 10, take 3 deep breaths, and everyone get on with your lives and try to be a better person in anyway you can.

    Sorry if my thoughts are all over the place, I'm a bit flustered after all the excitement today. Love you guys, .net. Best of luck to SharkHawk.
    Last edited by Maelstrom787 on Sun Jan 13, 2013 3:51 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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  • After the Superbowl i reminded myself that this is just a game, its supposed to be entertainment, and i can honestly say i've never been pissed about a lost since. Dissapointed, yes. But never upset.

    I think its all important for us to remember that whethe the Seahawks win or lose it still doesnt change our life tomorrow.
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  • JSeahawks wrote:After the Superbowl i reminded myself that this is just a game, its supposed to be entertainment, and i can honestly say i've never been pissed about a lost since. Dissapointed, yes. But never upset.

    I think its all important for us to remember that whethe the Seahawks win or lose it still doesnt change our life tomorrow.

    My thoughts EXACTLY.
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  • The Radish wrote:
    GeekHawk wrote:
    Largent80 wrote:I was so mad I vacuumed the floor.


    That sucks!


    ...bada-boom



    Besides its carrying things entire to far.


    The good news?....when i moved the couch a $20 bill was on the floor. :lol:
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  • JSeahawks wrote:Done.


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  • About 10 years ago a similar event happened to me. I was a very obsessed fan who lived and breathed Seahawks 24/7. My business suffered as I spent most of my waking hours reading and researching anything Seahawks related. It culminated with a home loss to the Rams on a last second TD. In my anger I kicked a gaping hole in the side of an easy chair. It was at that moment that I had a psychological shift in my mind. I figured if this obsession over something that I had no control over the outcomes of a game was going to cause me to destroy my own belongings I needed to rethink my life. To make a long story short, I still have a mild obsession with the Seahawks but I no longer let them effect me like I once did. I still thoroughly enjoy the wins and bum out at the losses, but now, for the most part I just enjoy the ride. As much as I one day want to experience a Super bowl victory, I will watch and enjoy the journey no matter where it takes me.

    Keep the faith, love your children, and try to look at the Seahawks as the best form of pure entertainment! Like a good movie, you never know how it ends.
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  • Maelstrom787 wrote:I'm going to make a serious post here. I'm also gonna admit something here that might get me in trouble with .net.

    I'm 17, so I'm a minor. I've posted in the shack and PWR forums before, so I don't know how severe a violation that is, and I'm sorry mods.

    This is me. I'm wearing a dress shirt and tie, because I am quite passionate about politics and felt like dressing up. I have a reputation as a very smart kid and the go-to person with any governmental or political questions. I've single-handedly turned most of my school into a breeding ground for new, young Libertarians. (I know a lot of you disagree with my views, but just ignore my political stances, they're not the point of this.)
    Image

    I'm also a swimmer, a lacrosse player, and soon to be football player as a senior in high school next year. I'm trying to get my grades up as I've recently gotten my life together. I want to try to get into University of Delaware, but that looks pretty unlikely. So I'm looking at some smaller, D-III type schools. I want to major in Secondary Education and become a teacher at my current high school after college. I have it all planned out.

    I say so much about my life, because today I've experienced such intense ups-and-downs from a game that I wasn't even playing. I ended up breaking my smartphone, the only nice thing I really have, out of sheer anger. My family is in financial ruins, and I'm not going to be able to afford another phone for a good while. I've been chilling and putting things into perspective, and it really is just a game. Although it is my passion, it may be quite unhealthy for me. There's so much more to life..

    I did say I was going to try out for football this year. I've been studying intensely and working out. RW has inspired me to try to be a starting QB for my team. It is my dream. My ex-girlfriend introduced me to the coach last year, when I was going through tough times. He's been sort of a life coach for me since. I used to get angry and smash things, and he'd always chill me out in his room and just sit and talk to me for a good hour about life. It helped me out, a bunch.

    I know it's not anything formal, but he helped me straighten out a bit, until my asshole relapse today. Maybe that can be likened to some anger management classes of sorts, SharkHawk. I don't want you to go, I look forward to your posts about as much as I do Kearly's. You're a treasure of .net, and a knowledgeable, respectable man. If you feel this is what's best, then from one person to another, I wish you the best in all future endeavors.

    I probably need some help myself. I'm going to channel my rage into working out harder from now on. I hope it goes well. Sometimes we all need to remember, it is just a game. A game that we're all passionate about and love, but a game nonetheless that we're not even playing. Count backwards from 10, take 3 deep breaths, and everyone get on with your lives and try to be a better person in anyway you can.

    Sorry if my thoughts are all over the place, I'm a bit flustered after all the excitement today. Love you guys, .net. Best of luck to SharkHawk.

    Good post, young man. Sounds like you have a good head on your shoulders. Sucks about the "relapse" but I was an angry kid like you growing up. You have to find something that works for you to calm you down...for me it was music and poetry. Whether it was listening, reading or writing.
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  • Maelstrom 787 - Can I help you get a new phone? That would help me feel a bit better. I wish somebody had stepped up for me at your age, because then I might not be pouring my heart and anger out today. I was once angry too... and strangely enough have calmed down a lot. But today was not ok. It's ok for you. You're 17. If I could help you hit the "rewind" and get a phone back in your hands and feel like it's ok and you don't have to lose your one nice possession because you reacted the same way I did, then maybe it would be good for both of us. I have been duct taping the remote for the last hour, and it might still work. I got it to power the tv up, so that's a good sign. Looks like I'm ok, as the logic board didn't shatter, it just went flying (way too close to my son's head).

    I held my son and told him I was sorry, that there was no excuse, and that I am his number 1 fan and football isn't important, but he is. He and I both just sobbed and sobbed as I held him. I know he's hurting having seen his dad "go off" because I am a kind, patient, and loving father. I am so down because I have 2 college degrees in this stuff. I have degrees in child development and early childhood education and elementary education. I know better. I've learned better. Yet I still just flat out blew it.

    I'd like to help if I can. Let me know if there is anything I can do to help you ease your burden of losing your phone today. I don't have much... but I sure will try to help you rectify your mistake.
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  • Shark,

    1. I am really sorry that happened in front of your kids. 

    2. I am sorry that so many bad things have happened to you recently. 

    3. I am sorry you are considering no longer following the Hawks. 

    BUT 

    You cannot undo what happened today in front of your kids. (no one was injured). We all screw up as parents, and I think the best thing you can do is to hug them, tell them you are so sorry for what happened, and going forward resolve to yourself to never again lose control around them, WHATEVER that takes. (Lots of what others here have already said).  They will forgive you. Now you have the offseason to take a break and figure it out. 

    I have IMMENSE deal of respect for your decision, and I say that even though I love your posts! People react to games and stresses in different ways, and you HAVE to take care of yourself, especially for your kids. That is crucial! And you may be feeling pretty low right now on a couple of fronts,  but what you have done takes a ton of courage - you have not only recognized a problem but are actively figuring out how to cure it. Even if that means giving up your beloved team (temporarily or for good).

    I may not be adding more value here, but after you talk to your kids and take advantage of that "teachable moment", think about what it will take to not let your anger get the better of you. Anger mgmt? (again, it is brave to admit a problem and seek help). Getting a DVR and watching games after the kids are asleep so you get more time with them while they are awake (this is what I do actually, love it)? Going cold turkey from Seahawks games (you can always just check the final scores; far less stressful)? Faith or zen?

    I don't have the answer but I hope some of this is helpful. I am extremely self critical about being a dad so if ever you want to discuss this further or just vent, please PM me. I wish you the best and will keep you all in my prayers. 

    cheers /td
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  • Well each of us knows our own boundries, they shift from time to time depending on our age, level of stress etc. I respect Shark for stepping up and making a judgement call on himself as well as sharing a part of himself with us that is not flattering. As I stated before I have some experience with having to humble myself in front of my boys when they were young.

    But as you find the understanding and possibly the way to control the emotions we feel on those type of days I am hoping you will grace us again with your presence and knowledge.

    Take care, don't be a stranger and know that many of us here value your insights and contributions.

    Thank you Shark and it's not good bye my freind it's see ya soon!
    Last edited by chris98251 on Sun Jan 13, 2013 4:11 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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  • JSeahawks wrote:After the Superbowl i reminded myself that this is just a game, its supposed to be entertainment, and i can honestly say i've never been pissed about a lost since. Dissapointed, yes. But never upset.

    I think its all important for us to remember that whethe the Seahawks win or lose it still doesnt change our life tomorrow.


    ^^^^^^^ This..............XL made me realize (over time) that at the end of the day it's just a game. Just kick back and enjoy the game / ride, for however long it lasts.
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  • Foghawk wrote:
    JSeahawks wrote:After the Superbowl i reminded myself that this is just a game, its supposed to be entertainment, and i can honestly say i've never been pissed about a lost since. Dissapointed, yes. But never upset.

    I think its all important for us to remember that whethe the Seahawks win or lose it still doesnt change our life tomorrow.


    ^^^^^^^ This..............XL made me realize (over time) that at the end of the day it's just a game. Just kick back and enjoy the game / ride, for however long it lasts.


    ...and there's some silver lining right there. At least they won't be able to rip us off in the SB again. Feel good about that!
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  • I totally hear you. I used to be THAT into football. Really, the NFL was damn near my life. When I wasn't watching the NFL, it was NCAA, but it had to be football. Used to love basketball almost that much until the NBA stole the Sonics away from us. Then something changed: I had kids.

    I couldn't bear to freak out on the kids like I would've 5 years ago or so. They don't understand, and it's not their fault, I don't like it when my wife takes stuff out on me that I didn't do, so I try not to reciprocate. So, I understand.

    I'm not done with football, or the Seahawks, but for the first time in a long time, I'm done watching the rest of the playoffs, and don't really care who wins the Superbowl. I'm a fan of football, so when the Seahawks lose in the Wildcard, or the divisional, or when we usually don't make it, I keep watching the games. This year, we were so close; this felt so real. This really was our one window from the injury perspective; we were incredibly healthy this year, and it stands to reason that luck won't hold.

    Good luck Sharkhawk. Try watching from a distance, and maybe gradually work your way back in.
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  • HawkWow wrote:
    Foghawk wrote:
    JSeahawks wrote:After the Superbowl i reminded myself that this is just a game, its supposed to be entertainment, and i can honestly say i've never been pissed about a lost since. Dissapointed, yes. But never upset.

    I think its all important for us to remember that whethe the Seahawks win or lose it still doesnt change our life tomorrow.


    ^^^^^^^ This..............XL made me realize (over time) that at the end of the day it's just a game. Just kick back and enjoy the game / ride, for however long it lasts.


    ...and there's some silver lining right there. At least they won't be able to rip us off in the SB again. Feel good about that!


    :0190l: :0190l: :0190l:
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  • SharkHawk wrote:Maelstrom 787 - Can I help you get a new phone? That would help me feel a bit better. I wish somebody had stepped up for me at your age, because then I might not be pouring my heart and anger out today. I was once angry too... and strangely enough have calmed down a lot. But today was not ok. It's ok for you. You're 17. If I could help you hit the "rewind" and get a phone back in your hands and feel like it's ok and you don't have to lose your one nice possession because you reacted the same way I did, then maybe it would be good for both of us. I have been duct taping the remote for the last hour, and it might still work. I got it to power the tv up, so that's a good sign. Looks like I'm ok, as the logic board didn't shatter, it just went flying (way too close to my son's head).

    I held my son and told him I was sorry, that there was no excuse, and that I am his number 1 fan and football isn't important, but he is. He and I both just sobbed and sobbed as I held him. I know he's hurting having seen his dad "go off" because I am a kind, patient, and loving father. I am so down because I have 2 college degrees in this stuff. I have degrees in child development and early childhood education and elementary education. I know better. I've learned better. Yet I still just flat out blew it.

    I'd like to help if I can. Let me know if there is anything I can do to help you ease your burden of losing your phone today. I don't have much... but I sure will try to help you rectify your mistake.


    That sounds nice, but I really think I should tough it out. I made the mistake, and I feel like I should rectify it myself, as a young man about to be thrust into the world. I should probably learn to deal with the consequences of my actions now. After all, it's just a phone. Maybe I can turn this into a life lesson on responsibility, independence, and keeping my emotions in check.

    It actually might be sort of a blessing in disguise. Now, instead of Facebooking, maybe I'll have to focus on doing this chemistry homework instead of procrastinating and messaging girls, haha. I have plenty of other blessings in life, like a roof over my head, food, clothing, etc. I'm a bit bummed, but now it's just me, my lacrosse stick, my football and my schoolwork as far as my list of things to do goes. I feel like I can emerge a better person from this.

    I'm so grateful that you'd try to help me out with this, though. That's amazingly good of you. Thank you so much, sir.
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  • Yes, you should.
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  • Maelstrom787 wrote:I'm going to make a serious post here....

    I'm 17, so I'm a minor....

    I've single-handedly turned most of my school into a breeding ground for new, young Libertarians.


    Rock-on young Libertarian....change the world! :th2thumbs:
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  • Happy trails. Choosing family is always the right choice. I can easily relate to the "taking over your life" aspect of reasoning.

    Just as an aside, I can't really relate to your emotions (specifically today)- the Seahawks did their damndest to kill my emotions in the first 3 quarters. I had no emotions this game. I was just happy that Seattle was making a game of it at the end. Sounds like there were other forms of stress and the game just kind of melded with them.
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  • Hang in there Shark. Do what you have to, I have considered similar options as well. Family wins out every time. They are the ones who matter and your sports passion cannot replace them when it is all said and done.

    Following sports can be such a rush but in the end it is fleeting. I think the sense of being part of something is somewhat an illusion as your own fans really aren't your friends some times. See this very thread of the good and bad of how varied your fellow fans can view you. We try but not all are that connected.

    Best of luck with whatever you decide.
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  • Umm, no Shark. How about that?

    Learn to manage your emotions AND enjoy football. You can do it.

    You know JS and Petey are going to pull more WAC/MWest players out their ass again, right? You expect me to listen to Kiper for thos players?
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  • Shark, you posted something the other day about your mom's HOA. I am not there, I don't know what your life is like, but your anger doesn't seem tied directly to the Hawks. Your anger is YOUR anger, and getting rid of your football team is treating a symptom, not treating the real issue. If you don't fix the inner issue, it will be something else next time.
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  • I'm right there when it comes to wearing my emotions on my sleeve when it comes to the outcome of Hawks games. To the point where my wife just wants them to win so I'm in a good mood for the next week. Taking a step back has helped me and like others said puts the "game" part of it in perspective. I want my boys to enjoy the sport too...and they won't if they connect it to an angry parent, so I know where you're coming from. Balance can be had though...so hopefully you'll come to find some. Stay strong, brother!
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    FortWorthSeahawk
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  • Sharkhawk,

    Part of life is imperfection, our emotions are volatile, that's part of being human. Football isn't the issue, thats not the root of anger, its merely an vehicle that it comes out. Removing football from your life, in my opinion, does not solve the root of the problem, it merely hides it until you invest yourself in something else.

    I don't have children, so I haven't experienced that exact situation, but I've lashed out at loved ones and friends multiple times over the years about the Seahawks. It's amazing how much a game that we are not participating in compels such powerful emotions. I never, ever, get as upset when I'm actually playing a damn sport.

    That's my two cents.
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    seahawk2k
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  • It is a football game. A football game. A football game. Sure, I'm not in as great of a mood when they lose as I am when they win, for a couple hours, but it is a football game. A game of football. For 16-20 days per year, they entertain us, some years more than others. If you live and die with your team, you're going to die almost every year, or every year to date if you've been a Hawks fan. Let us clank our glasses when they win, whine a little when they lose, and enjoy being an American in a city that has a football team to make the soggy Sundays a bit more enjoyable. My friend, I hope you are with us next year rooting on our favorite team, but if you don't think you're up for doing it without harming yourself or your family, I completely respect your decision.
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    Tical21
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  • I didnt read all the posts, But to walk away from the game of football isnt the answer. A build up of everything you mentioned is a hard pill to swallow. it could have been one of many things that set you off to do such a thing. Just so happened the Hawks game was on. And it was freaking intense! My kid is a Falcons fan and 17 and full of trash talk! I must admit, It was real hard to keep my cool.

    You lost it. Okay. You threw a remote. cool. it shattered just like the twenty remotes I have thrown. But it has never gone further than that! Do you have anger issues beyond this episode? Is it built up stress? I guess only you can answer that. I do not know you personally, But from the story I just read. You need to apologize put it behind you but dont forget it. Punch a pillow, Get a man room, something. But we as men have this normal aggression that is driven by competition. Sports, Video games, lawn darts, or flick football. lol

    You made a mistake, You know it, you regret it. If it isnt a common theme then move on and learn from it. But to not watch the hawks? NEXT SEASON! Makes me wannna smash my screen just thinking about it!

    Take care. Dont beat yourself up.
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    djb28
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  • It's not just a game, its life and I' m postponing death until the Seahawks win the super bowl.
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    NFSeahawks628
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  • I understand where you're coming from, Shark... And I've been there myself in the past. Back when my wife was still my girlfriend, she made the mistake of calling me right after a Seahawks loss. I don't recall exactly who it was that they were playing, but I believe it was the Redskins or the Jaguars in the Super Bowl season. It was a game they had multiple chances to win, but it was blown because of missed field goals if I remember correctly. I believe the game was lost in OT but it's all fuzzy now.

    I ended up taking out my aggression on her for absolutely no good reason and we ended up breaking up because of that.

    After that, I made a vow that I would never let sports aggravate me that much again. It's not worth it, because as much as I sometimes want to convince myself that it does... It really doesn't mean anything.

    I haven't read more than just the first few posts in the thread, so maybe you have calmed down and changed your mind. I certainly hope so, as I enjoy reading your posts and think you bring something valuable to the table. Nothing is so broken that it can't be fixed, you just need to take things in stride and let the chips fall where they may.
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    Joshoeuh
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  • SharkHawk wrote:At this rate I'll be dead in about 30 minutes. Stupid blood pressure won't go down. Well, it was a fun ride. 35+ years invested and all I get is a wife who hates me and kids who are scared of me and a bunch of stupid navy and royal blue clothing. Not worth it.


    This is what I did......

    We're about the same age.
    I went on Facebook and announced my retirement from the NFL. lol. It's pretty fun actually.
    It really did change my way of thinking.
    When I watch games at home, I watch games ALONE. Unless my wife is home.
    It calmed me down greatly. I didn't like people barking random BS that always pissed me off.

    I'm a really quiet football watcher now and it allows me to process the game better.
    Unless I'm at the stadium. Then, I'm a raging idiot!
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    TheHawkster
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  • You need to stop taking football so seriously sometimes. Yes, it sucks that we lost, but anger is not going to make the loss go away. Instead of giving up on football, you might need to take anger management classes.
    "Go Hawks"
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    Geologic
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  • Shark, I wouldn't quit, just yet. You just need to learn to control your emotions. I've learned to do it over the last 8 or 9 years. I took the mindset that I can't control the outcome, I love the Hawks and support them win or lose. I appreciate the good plays, shake my head at the bad ones.

    What football has become to me is a time with my wife and kids. Time to time I may lose my composure (but usually my wife and kids are upset too, and they definitely understand).

    What I am saying is, your son has a wonderful opportunity to grow up enjoying games with his Dad. Also, he's liable to be a Chip off the old block, so the best thing you can do is show him how to manage his emotions while watching a game he has a passion for.

    That's just my .02.

    I do enjoy your contribution to the boards. I've been around a lot longer than my account says. I do hope you reconsider.
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    Starrman44
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  • I ate a whole half gallon of ice cream and a Papa Murphy's pizza after this loss. I now have acid reflux and actually have been gagging regurgitated food back up I'm so stuffed. I should have avoided all of this by masturbating.......

    Anyhow, serious shit in this thread. I hope Sharkey learns from this. No hand-wringing from me.
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    Slick
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  • Shark I'm with you. Been there, had a similar incident during our super bowl game. It is truly a life lesson. I love my kids dearly and part of my healing process from today's game was talking to my two 17 yr olds and my 10 yr old. I realized during the super bowl that I can be frustrated with that of which I can not control I CAN NOT get angry with that situation. There is NO positive out come. I will get up tomorrow and go to work like every other Monday I just won't be as happy as if we had won. Guess what I get to get my 10 yr old ready for school and tell my teenagers to get the hell out of here :). If we won today that wouldnt of changed at all.


    You need to do what's best for you and your family ,I know you have the support of all the .net gang and we would all like to have you back but we will completely understand if your presence is missing.
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  • Scottemojo wrote:Shark, you posted something the other day about your mom's HOA. I am not there, I don't know what your life is like, but your anger doesn't seem tied directly to the Hawks. Your anger is YOUR anger, and getting rid of your football team is treating a symptom, not treating the real issue. If you don't fix the inner issue, it will be something else next time.


    Thought the same thing when I first read this thread.
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    taz291819
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  • I think we all forget that we watch this game for entertainment. We needs to learn to enjoy every play whether its good or bad. In the end we are fortunate to watch the game let alone this team. We have a much more exciting team than alot of fans get to enjoy
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  • SharkHawk wrote:No, walking away isn't impossible. I've walked away from several "addictions" to keep my family intact. It's hanging by a thread as it is. This is the last one I had to kick. I used to play softball for about 5 teams. Let it ruin a lot of important stuff. I walked away from my one true calling in life... an elementary school teaching job that I'd had for 10 years, because it was threatening my family. Baseball and basketball consumed me. Now I don't watch either. Football was the last on my list. The one I thought I could hold onto and still have balance in my life. Unfortunately, my actions today and my REACTIONS (such as my BP hitting 185/120) show that I can't take it in "moderation". I am a football addict like some are crack addicts. It hurts my family. I have to quit. Just like I did with my ridiculous softball habit and every other stupid thing I've done. Football has to go. My kids are small and need me here longer than that and they should NEVER have to see such a thing from me. Not ever. I've humiliated my family enough through my actions. I owe them this.



    meh, nothing wrong with learning about passion at an early age... everyone has to have something

    may I suggest next year a cage type set up, your wife locks you in the cage with just a big screen covered with bullet proof glass and all your food and drinks come in plastic containers, finger food only no sharp utensils, no remotes, I also suggest she locks you in buck nekkid in case you get an urge to do something awful with a pant leg or some other article of clothing... ;)
    GO HAWKS!!!
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    Twisted
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  • SharkHawk wrote:I think seriously I have to be done. I did something I am so horribly ashamed of after the game and I don't know that I can in good conscience watch another game EVER. I feel awful. Just awful.

    I snapped at my kids and then threw the remote and it shattered against the wall and scared my kids. They both started crying. It's time for me to walk away. Everybody is really upset here. I think this is corny, but I also think it has to be my farewell. Sorry for putting it in the main forum, but it is most definitely Seahawks related, and I am sure many other fans are having a hard time coming to terms.

    Let what I did be a lesson. I'm lucky no pieces hit my children. But I can't put them through that anymore. I love them with all my heart. More than the Seahawks. I've given the Seahawks 36 years of my life to get it done. They've come close. But I can't leave my family without a father due to a heart attack, and I can't ever EVER harm my children by my words or actions. They deserve a better father, and unfortunately the Seahawks don't bring that out of me. Please don't label me a quitter or a whiner or a baby. Understand that my life has been destroyed in the last two years financially, career-wise, emotionally, and physically. This is the proverbial straw I guess. I just can't do this anymore.

    Please.... don't let this game get you like it did me. It was too much, so I step away and hope for a better future for the Hawks for all of YOUR sake. You guys deserve it. You put your butts in the seats and scream until your hoarse for this team. You 12's make me proud. I really have made some incredible friendships here, and hope to continue those, but after what I did today, I can NOT be involved in sports-fandom ever again. Now it's time to pick up the pieces so to speak and try to fix what I've done to my kids in scaring them senseless. No kid should ever have to be afraid of a game result because of how their Dad might handle it. My kids are awesome and they deserve better than the piece of crap I was today. Guilt overwhelms me. I am afraid for myself right now. I am sad for my kids. But I respect all of you and how you keep it together and find a balance where I never could.

    Rock on 12's.

    Jon Mohlman (the man behind the shark mask)



    The lesson of course is that IT IS JUST A FRUNTUCKING GAME!! You get nothing if the hawks win, you lose nothing if the hawks lose. You're not on the team. If the hawks win, it is THEIR accomplishment, not yours. Stop "living through the hawks" like loser parents live through their kids when their kids are playing 5th grade soccer.

    The solution, obviously, is have your own accomplishments. Accomplish something that's yours. It doesn't have to be building a fortune 500 company, it can be starting your own business and excelling, it can be becoming all that's possible in your current role in life, it can be anything you have a passion for.

    Not directed at the author of the post above, but to everyone on the planet.

    edit: "I walked away from my one true calling in life... an elementary school teaching job that I'd had for 10 years..."
    I'm only an arm chair psychologist on Monday's, but the above seems to be the problem to me.
    Last edited by plyka on Sun Jan 13, 2013 7:41 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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  • Twisted wrote:
    SharkHawk wrote:No, walking away isn't impossible. I've walked away from several "addictions" to keep my family intact. It's hanging by a thread as it is. This is the last one I had to kick. I used to play softball for about 5 teams. Let it ruin a lot of important stuff. I walked away from my one true calling in life... an elementary school teaching job that I'd had for 10 years, because it was threatening my family. Baseball and basketball consumed me. Now I don't watch either. Football was the last on my list. The one I thought I could hold onto and still have balance in my life. Unfortunately, my actions today and my REACTIONS (such as my BP hitting 185/120) show that I can't take it in "moderation". I am a football addict like some are crack addicts. It hurts my family. I have to quit. Just like I did with my ridiculous softball habit and every other stupid thing I've done. Football has to go. My kids are small and need me here longer than that and they should NEVER have to see such a thing from me. Not ever. I've humiliated my family enough through my actions. I owe them this.



    meh, nothing wrong with learning about passion at an early age... everyone has to have something

    may I suggest next year a cage type set up, your wife locks you in the cage with just a big screen covered with bullet proof glass and all your food and drinks come in plastic containers, finger food only no sharp utensils, no remotes, I also suggest she locks you in buck nekkid in case you get an urge to do something awful with a pant leg or some other article of clothing... ;)


    I've done this...sort've. We use to have epic parties for the big fights and big games. I mean, like 200-300 people. With that many people, you're going to get some idiots. I would grab my cooler and my chair and find the best viewing angle of the best TV. I would then take duct tape and on the floor, make a square about 5'x5' surrounding my area. That was the off limits area to anyone uninvited into my squared circle. I'm sure lives were saved.
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  • Scottemojo wrote:Shark, you posted something the other day about your mom's HOA. I am not there, I don't know what your life is like, but your anger doesn't seem tied directly to the Hawks. Your anger is YOUR anger, and getting rid of your football team is treating a symptom, not treating the real issue. If you don't fix the inner issue, it will be something else next time.

    Scotte's got it nailed here, Shark. Hope things get better.
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    pinksheets
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  • Too many posts to go through, but you've been given some great advice here. Especially the anger management stuff. Someome may have said this already, but let me offer you this advice (coming from a guy with two kids that had to deal with an UGLY divorce). Let it go sooner than later. Kids are resiliant and they also love you. They don't want their daddy to hurt. They hurt when you hurt...and vice versa. Explain the situation, then let it go asap. Take them for an ice cream, smile and get happy. Then do some soul searching independant of them.
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    HawkWow
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  • SharkHawk wrote:Sorry I caused trouble guys. I never in all my years have done anything I felt was an attempt at drawing attention to myself. I didn't ever try to use this place as a spot to show of my writing to get other jobs, I haven't been mean to folks, I've tried to offer insight on the players like Turbin, Wagner, and McQuistan who have come out of the intermountain region. I just tried to be a good board member and treat others with respect (and some playful fake arguing back and forth).

    This post was put up for 3 reasons.

    1- As an apology to my family so they'd see I was serious.

    2- As a warning to others about what can happen if you let this stuff consume you.

    3- Just as a confession to you all that I felt badly about what I had done and hope none of you ever do the same, because you can't take stuff like that back.

    If that makes me an "attention whore" then so be it. I've not done anything like this before. I am filled with remorse, and I need to let my son specifically know that I'm his fan way more than any football team. He needs that. I need that. I hoped that if anybody could take something positive away from that, then it was worth baring my soul and my real name and just putting it out there. Anonymity... gone. My "dirty little secret"? Gone. My need to watch a team that causes friction and now some really scary reaction that I had little control over? Has to stop. That's all.

    As I said... I have many great friends here and hope to keep it that way. I just can't watch Seahawks games anymore. They make me something I never wanted to be. No alcohol involved. Just my inability to cope, and I think it's because I've fallen off the rails in my life in all that I've lost and messed up on. This is just another step and something I've got to make right. I don't feel I was seeking attention when I congratulated all of you on what you have done, in fact I felt guilty that I couldn't be the guy many of you are, and at my age, it's just childish that I can't be.

    Do you really, honestly think that I'd want to draw attention to my complete lack of maturity, my family falling apart, and my need to stop this obsession with a team? It's embarrassing. I did it as a warning to others to not make the mistakes I did. I wouldn't shell out my personal info and stuff if I were looking for attention. I'd go write an article for Bleacher Report or Yahoo Sports. Those are things I've never done. I've stayed here. I've done my best to be a helpful member, and I've met many good friends along the way. This message was for them. I don't want them harming their relationships with their family... especially the young guys I've met here that are still not married or don't have kids. I don't want them falling into this trap I have where the results create the environment in a home. It's not worth it.

    Keep your attention. I don't want it. If it's better.... delete all of my posts, ban me, delete my account. I'm fine with that. I don't want to create issues here. This place is too good with too many truly great guys. I care about them all, and don't want them to turn out like me. I've tried so hard for two years to regain who I am and resume my life.

    I was told as things continued to spiral down worse that "God will never give you more than you can handle." Well... I disagree. He has. I've snapped. I have gone over the edge in many many ways. Football was a place for me to find some happiness, but only when the Hawks one. I let the results that didn't go in our favor drag me into a darker place. Now I haven't been able to heal, haven't been able to get a teaching job which I feel I desperately need, and I haven't been able to support my family. Things are falling apart. I guess that makes me a whore in some eyes. I hope in others, it simply makes me a cautionary tale. That's all. Simple as that. Don't fall into the trap Jon did. Your families and loved ones deserve better.

    I don't think it makes you an attention whore. I do think it's an indication that, as others have said, you may want to seek out counseling to help you deal with all the things you're going through in your life.
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  • Sometimes, our children teach us...

    Right before when we failed to score anything and time expired, I simply yelled "DAMN!"

    My 5yr old son responded, "Dad remembah, it's just a game and all that matters is you have fun. We'll get em next time."

    We really enjoyed the 2nd half together and almost got to hold on to that amazing comeback. Oh we'll, the future's bright for both the Seahawks and my son.

    All the best to all 12s... Be proud.
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    CHawks4L
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  • Damn Shark... That's rough.

    I've really blown up in front of my boy only once and I swear to god i'll never do it again. There is nothing in the world worse than the look on the face of a two year old little boy in Spiderman PJ's who thinks you're his hero when he is absolutely terrified of you. That look will haunt me forever. I absolutely feel your pain my brother. But as others have said, kids are resilient and as long as you love him (and this isnt a recurring thing) yours will bounce back just like mine did.

    I don't know Jon, but i know Sharkhawk is a good dude with a good soul. I hope you can slay whatever demons are screwing with you and get back on top of things. As someone else said, if they win you don't get paid and if they lose you don't get fired. It's just for funzies, and if it isn't fun for you anymore it's okay for you to hang it up for a while while you sort out the rest of your life. Hope to see you back here again putting up your inappropriately long posts and dropping mad knowledge about the wac.

    Good luck my brutha....

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  • At this rate I'll be dead in about 30 minutes. Stupid blood pressure won't go down. Well, it was a fun ride. 35+ years invested and all I get is a wife who hates me and kids who are scared of me and a bunch of stupid navy and royal blue clothing. Not worth it.


    Shark,

    First of all I respect you for your post. Good luck with your decision whatever it may be. You seem like a really genuine person.

    However, IMO you are not looking at this situation correctly. We are all bummed out over this loss. Very few of us lashed out physically. This is not a knock on you at all, I am just saying - as others have suggested, that football is the symptom not the diagnosis.

    I want to confess something to you. I know it is selfish, but it illustrates why football means so much to me. I didn't want the Seahawks to win the superbowl this year. (I did want them to get farther, though). Or next year. Or the year after that. My son is 3. Doesn't care a lick about football. But one day, he probably will, because his daddy does. And he will watch games with me. And we will go to games. I would like nothing more than my son to share my love for football and Seahawks and have that become something that binds us together as father and son. I want us to get that first Lombardi when he is old enough to understand what it means and have it be something we share together.

    So I'm sorry if I don't like your comment about the scraps of navy blue clothing. Just like our countries flag is greater than the material that it is composed of, the seahawks logo and the 12th man flag mean more than a silly native american-esque bird-totem-head and a damn number. It might mean something different for all of us. For me it a connection to the place I grew up but can no longer live in. More importantly, it is a hope for a lifelong bond with my son. Something me and my own father didn't really have.

    Aside from the obvious monkey of having never one the big one once, its really more about the ride. You say you haven't gotten anything out of your fandom in so many years, but what I am suggesting to you is you can cultivate your love of football into something very positive for your kids. There will be losses, and if your kids get into the game they will feel the pain too. This is a chance for a valuable life lesson. They will deal with all kinds of adversity in life, why not set an example for them on how to do so?

    Football is not just a game. It actually is more than that for us, and thats OK. It is a sub-narrative for our lives for those of us that are intertwined with it. It shouldn't be the center of our lives, but being a prominent aspect of it is fine. I agree if you were that angry you need to take a step back, but consider finding a sensible place in your life for the Seahawks.
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  • This poster has been banned courtesy of JSeahawks for being a disgrace of a human being and a typical 49er asshat.
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  • ^ Andddddddd the hammer falls.
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    pinksheets
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  • Not trying to sound like an un-empathetic prick but, you need to watch the episode of South Park where Stan's dad decides he's an alcoholic after he gets a dui. Now the point I'm trying to make is that you let your emotions get the best of you. Like alcoholism, anger can be controlled by your actions. All you need is discipline, or as Stan says ( disaprin). At no point are the Seahawks to blame, just you. You flew off the handle and need to use that as a learning point and a step. A step to become a better stronger person.

    One more point to drive this home is that my uncle was an alcoholic about twenty years ago...since he punched holes in walls when life didn't go his way and Johnny walker helped him, he would punch weak drywall like a big tough guy in front of his kids. Now he refuses to have a single beer, because he fears what will become of him.

    Sorry for the long post about a situation I have zero experience in, but if you take nothing from this please understand...

    -you are in complete control of your actions...be strong, don't be a slave to your emotions
    -have discipline when life isnt going exactly how you want it to, "there's a king in every crowd", learn something from one of your favorite players
    -be strong
    - you can't turn your passion for the hawks off, you can turn off flying off the handle in front of kids who think the day begins and ends with you.

    Just my opinion...go hawks
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