First, I'll have to grant the OP's premise that sometimes things can seem divisive and hostile on here. Speaking only for myself, I've learned to not get overly attached to any difference of opinion, or seemingly hostile line of questioning others might have. Different posters definitely have a "posting personality", and their own unique viewpoint. Sometimes there are posters who abuse the same themes over and over and over, same old second-guessing complaints. Overall, the board makes up for it by having so many terrific posters who share interesting information. As someone else pointed out, sometimes a PM exchange can clear up misunderstandings and get things onto a friendly track.
I really appreciate posters who offer a different spin, make me think about things I was unaware of, or share unique insights. For example, BigSkyDoc seems to be a real doc, who can break down injuries and surgeries and recovery prognoses, in a concise, authoritative, and useful way. I love the info and analysis Fade puts into his posts. I PM'ed JerHawk not that long ago to compliment him on how well he set up a survey thread. I've enjoyed the posts of RamFan128 in the NFL forum, which I only truly discovered a year ago. We have an abundance of terrific other-team posters on this board. Heck, I can say positive things about interactions with pretty much everyone who's posted in this thread.
Before this board, it was hard to know the truth about players, coaches, and schemes, because the traditional media just didn't cover the negatives and shortcoming accurately, trying to be "nice" or whatever. For example, which offensive linemen are good, which ones truly suck, and what are their actual strengths and weaknesses, and why would you play one over the other, against a particular opponent? This board can provide answers to that question, and yes, sorting through opinions, but overall with a lot of good, high quality and often in-depth information being shared. Does DC KNJ really suck horribly, or are there other factors handicapping him? That one's still an open question, but this is the best place to get unfiltered and sometimes even accurate info. (I think it's been over a week since the latest "Fire Norton!" thread) Anyway, this place is great for getting answers to those many questions inquiring minds want to know.